Saturday, October 11, 2008

Love is not a heart of life, its only a part of life...


On last semester break, I flew to my country, hoping for happiness and joyful moments with my family and friends... Somehow, my trip back to Maldives was planned with two missions... One was to spend a joyous time with my family and friends... The other main reason was to meet a girl who has always had a special place in my heart... With all my luck, I met her and things went as planned...

When I told my friends that I was going to meet her, nobody liked it... But I convinced them to believe that I wasn't going to start a relationship with her or to propose her... When I told them that I only want to talk to her, they all were some what okay with it... I didn't want her to see that I have some feelings to her... Though she knew it, I didn't want to talk to her on that topic... There were so many reasons that I can't explain here... And I can still taste the bitterness of my relationship with a girl and coz of that now I don't want to trust any girl and I can't do that...

But still I kept my feelings on one side and went to meet her... We met each other near one famous shop in Male'... Because it was just to see each other, we didn't wait long to talk... But two or three days later, we met in a restaurant... All she wanted was to share the story of her life... She almost told me everything about her life... The moment she told me the story, my heart broke into pieces... But still, I forced my self to keep the love I have to her in a side and offer a hand of friendship... She also wanted to have a good friendship with me... That's what she only wants...

Since that day, I kept thinking about her more... We were almost always connected through sms and calls... But, coz of some busy time she had, we lost connection for a week... Those days I was in my island with my family, but I started to miss her... I started thinking about her in the night when I go to sleep... I knew what was happening to me... Slowly what all my counselors (my buddies) kept telling started to happen... I got lost in her world... No matter how much I tried, I knew I cant stay away from her...

Later again, when she was free from her work, we started exchanging msgs... But unlike last time, i tried to keep distance. I took the decision again by thinking of the last relationship I had and coz of some other reasons... But still, the night before I came to sri lanka, I talked to her over the phone for a very long time... When the call ended, I was crying deep inside...

Now I rarely meet her, and most of the times I'm lost in her thoughts... No matter how hard I try not to think, I think about her... I always want to meet her and keep waiting for a time when she comes online...

As far as I know, she will know how I feel about her... Though I didn't want to show it to her, I told her of it... because of that, both of us want to talk as friends... Though I cant make her mine, I will always try to remain as her friend... For now, that's also enough for me... I wish her happiness always....

Friday, October 10, 2008

New heights... Wat will be new?


Yesterday, for the first time in Maldives, a multiparty election was held... From it's results, we got a very positive signal that from the horizon, we have started to see the sun is about to set after almost shining over Maldives for 30 years... if Maldivians really want a good change, we will succeed insha allah... But Allah only knows when it's time for a change. what we can only do is to work hard to bring the change we want...

- a president who didn't realise what human rights is for the past 30 years, he won't realize it in 5 years even though he reach new heights, wud he?...

- In the past 30 years, when he didn't know what a constitution is and how to follow it, he cant do that in the new heights he reach in the next five years...

- for 30 years, he used religion as a shield to protect himself against political issues, and confused the public about the revelation of quran to secure his seat as a president and to rule over people...

- for the past 30 years, when he kept spending the money of the government budget to satisfy his friends and relatives, he can reach new heights, but it wont stop...

- in a muslim nation where drug is prohibited, can he stop the drug deals in five years when he couldnt stop it when is started? he destroyed our young generation. can he bring them back and make them useful for our nation?...

- In the next five years can he build houses for the people who lost their houses in 2004 and give them a happy life. Can he do it while he couldnt do it from the moment the money from foreign countries started to pour over our nation to help the victims?...

i dont want someone who appears like a president, or someone who looks religious or special or fair... I dont want a person who knows about religion but who never followed its rules and kept watching when the Maldives took over the western style... i want someone who realise that all Maldivians are equal and they also deserve to get their rights... I want a president who can give the human rights equally among the people. someonoe who can listen to our voice...

So again, my vote for anni is for a change i wanted to see for the last few years...

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Exams over... getting ready to go to the sunny side of life....


At last its over for this sem.. and nw its holidays.. welll almost after one year am gonna go to my home... yeeppeee gonna go to the sunny side of life on 20th of this month....

Cant wait to seee my nieces, nephews and cousins and all my family members.... After one year I'm gonna see them inshaa allah..

I hope this trip will be a memorable trip for me..Coz this time, i might meet very special 2 people in my life... One is a girl who was trying to meet me for last 7 months and finally she met me from msn on july last week and we had a really nice talk that night..But later that night i couldn't get much time to talk her coz of my studies n stuff... But will meet her in person this time inshaa allah :D The other one is someone who I always wanted to talk and meet.. Bt i coudnt get any chance yet... hoping my dreams are gonna come true this time inshaa allah.... dreaming too much is nt goood right???

The other thing is this time i have to face a big prob coz i know i have to face many questions from my family, my friends and some other people who knows me... Thats about my blind relationship which ended for good recently...the worst relationship i ever had... What do I have to do?? Do I have a right for talking about MY LIFE..??? Should I tell them the truth..? As I know, I have full rights to tell them about MY LIFE..
Pics taken by me..

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Happy B'day


Today is Zayan kokko's b'day. He is the cousin I love most... Today is Maai's b'day too... Maai is a cousin of Uniqu3 Graph!X. Wish both of them a very happy b'day...

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

What was it???


I have no idea how to start this... really i dunno.. I just wanna share little abt my feelings again... Just cant keep it with only me... Last night was a really very very happy night for me.. I will never forget last night.. Something really nice happened to me... I even dunno how to explain my feelings.. I thought i was in a dream, but never mind if it was a dream or not, I was really happy even if it was just for that once... Donno it's a good or bad sign for me.. Dunno hw things will turn out tommorrow... Last nights incident was more than i cud ask for. That's what i know... It's very complicated and i prefer keeping it only with me, hoping that this dream of mine won't turn into a nightmare... So Sorry fellow readers to keep u in confusion... :D
Pic taken from deviantart

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Waiting for you....


It's been days since i have updated my blog last. Getting my girl friend back after 4 months brought a big change to my life. It was like going back in time and making things right. We only get one chance to find the true love. But i got a second chance to find it again, and I'm never going to let it go.

Things are whole lot better and different for me now. instead of worrying about updating the blog, i was always hoping for a call from my angel. My mobile phone is the dearest thing to me now. Coz now, she calls me very often, and we are in touch more than ever.. it's like the distance is not that distant anymore.

That's y I don't come online very often these days. But then again, the time is coming for me to return back to use to have online chats. Coz she's flying back and i won't hear her sweet voice for few months again. Last month was a happy time for me, we talked over the phone and it was like being there with her. Sad thing is that, it's almost going to be an year, without even seeing my angel. I really wanted to meet you darling, and if not for now, i can't wait to see you this December. INSHA ALLAH…

I want you to know that i really love you and my life will be incomplete without you. I need you more than ever and you're everything for me now. We had dreams together, we planned a lot of things for our life, hope that will all come true and we will be together, forever...

I'm gonna miss you dear, but i will wait and I'll be patient.
Pic taken from deviantart

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Finally its Ours....


Read more
Pic designed by me.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Congrtzzz Maldivian National Team....


Yesterday Maldives beat THE LIONS on their own land and won the match... dhagadey gave the pass and oppo scored the goal on the 27th minute of the second half. it was a really nice goal.. It was my first time in a stadium with such a big crowd, and i really wanted to see how the supporters reacts when the Maldives score a goal.. But at when Maldives scored, i couldn't look for the supporters, i myself was full of joy and felt proud of our National team... I didn't know what i did that time.. Coz everyone was shouting and screaming...

We went in a crowd of 13 people to the ground around 6:00PM. Match started at 7:30PM.. Some Maldivians went to the ground by a bus from Maldives High Commission.. We were wearing red t-shirt as all the other Maldivians with head bands and little face faints... I can't exactly say how many Maldivians were there, but it must be more than 1500, i guess. It was no different than being in our own country. I'm proud of our National team and of course all the supporters for the support they gave.

Final match will be held at Sugathadasa Staduim on 14th June. This time it's Ours.. Insha allah...
Pics taken by Iboo.

Monday, June 09, 2008

Happy b'day Dheekko...


Btw happy b'day to lallu,Juwey and Sanjay tooo...

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Monday, June 02, 2008

Yes or no?


White snow, again will change colors.
As in a dream, time will change masks.
And I will tell you, I love as I breathe.
And I want to know the answer - yes or no?

When we fly in the skies, then we will realise
That love is different, love is like a dream.
Hence it will be so, let nobody judge
Those who are in love, and love someone.

I wish for keys of heaven,
So i could run towards you to the edge,
To understand everything, to forgive everything,
To suddenly change everything,
And to say forever - yes or no.

Poet: unknown
Pic taken from deviantart

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Our life is full of ups and downs...


Almost 5 months back my girlfriend ended our relationship. i was really depressed and was left behind with so many un-answered questions.

Our life is full of ups and downs... we never know what's going to happen tomorrow. I trust in Allah and i beleive that if we really want something from the bottom of our heart and try for it, we will get it. I listened to my heart and finally i managed to contact her tonight. I wanted some answers from her, now that we have talked tonight, we learnt a little more about each other once more. I forgive her for what she did unknowingly, and i apologise for what she had to go through because of me.

If she is ready to start a new relationship with me again, I'll try to make it a beautiful one. One that's more precious than the pearls and shining brighter than the stars...

Pic taken from deviantart

Saturday, May 31, 2008

My first suregry was a success...


Its been more than one month for my surgery..And after looong time of suffering with the ear, only day before yesterday (29th Apriil) Doctor told me that my surgery was a 100% success.. Alhamdu lillah...

Now i don't have to worry about dust going inside the ear when im out. or water going while i bath.Yesterday i cut my hair after looong time.. Now i can fly, swim and can lift heavy things.. Yaahooo... It's like being free once again :D

Thnx for Dr.Sobitha.. The surgeon who did the surgery... He was the friendly, caring, nicest, coolest and funniest doc i have ever met (as if i know many other docs :P )... Thnx for my family and all my friends...

Pic taken from deviantart

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

What am I thinking to do now??? Why am I thinking to do that now???


"Yeah from today I took my final decision… I won't wait for her and waste my precious time as i wasted two whole years. For the first time, i want to live my life for me. I also have a right to choose what's good for me and what's not. Now I realize that I was too easy to play with. I don't want it to be that way. Not anymore!" That's wat i said 4 months ago...

But now my heart has turned over the other way… Don't ask me WHY.. Coz even I don't know why I am thinking abt her and wanting to talk her… But I know now again I really want her.. I believe what others say too.. I talked some ppl abt this and they all said same thing.. She betrayed me for nothing and now again I am trying to get her.. So same thing might happen later again.. How is it possible to trust her that she won't do it.. She must think that i'm also of some value & i'm not a toy to throw away without showing any valid reason.. Most of them tell me, if she comes to me and tell me why she did it or if she apologize then it's ok to be with her.. Coz I apologized for what I did to her.. Yeah I believe that but what to do.. I controlled my heart for four months but now ….. I always tell everyone (my friends) "if once a girl/boy betrays you, don't even think of going back to her/him. You should have some value in front of them. There are lots of girls/boys out there." bt when it comes to me what happened to me??? Sometimes my heart says to do that n sometimes it says not to do this…..

Tomorrow she will finish her first semester exam.. for the past 4 months I never tried to talk her, not coz I didn't want to.. But coz of her studies I didn't want to disturb her… I still love her and I need her… I know still my family wants her back..

My heart says talk to her and try to get her… So do I have to call her?? Will she talk to me?? Am I going to do a right thing?? Why am I thinking to do this??? If I don't try to talk her, can I get her?? Telling that's her fault, she betrayed me and staying like this, can I get her??? Without trying can anyone reach their goal??? If I talk her first, am I a looser??

Pic taken from deviantart

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Thnx for everyone who wished me


Yesterday was my b'day and i had a wonderful day... for me it was a normal day till i got a little surprise... It was from my best friend and his two brothers... well, before that i took some neigbour kids to Mc donald's.. it was a wonderful time with those kids.. they had so much fun.. i won't forget how udhula (the smallest one of them) ate the chips and the ice cream...

I couldn't take out my neighbor out yesterday. I promised him that i'll give him a treat too.. he doesn't like to go Mc, KFC, dine more or pizza hut.. So i was planning to go to have some different flavored ice cream.. That's for his request.. So i thought to take my best friends two bros with him, coz then only we can make fun..But he didn't get time to go there so we postponed it for today or tomorrow..

Anyways thnx for everyone who wished me by sms, calls, Ek, face book, Msn, this blog and in person.. A very very big thanx goes to my best friend and his two brothers...

Pics taken by Uniqu3 Graph!X

Sunday, April 27, 2008

One more week...


Today i went to hospital to remove the bandage, But it seems that still it's not fully healed to remove the bandage. So doctor changed the bandage and advised me to keep it one more week again.. So again i am waiting..

Unfortunately i have sinus problem and doctor says it's bad news... he said that the sinus cold might cause some problem and as I blow out my nose, it might effect the ear... So he gave me some more medicine for the sinus.. He told me to sneeze very loud, without covering my mouth and be more careful. Otherwise there might be some complications...
Pic taken from deviantart

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

My first Surgery....


I have done an ear surgery on 20th April. I went to the hospital early morning at 6:00 and got admitted there. My mom is also here for my surgery and my friend’s cousin, aunt and two of my neighbors also went to the hospital. I got registered and was taken to the room and they did an ECG and blood sugar test. Later they gave me a green pajama to wear and were taken to the theatre. I wasn’t very scared but was little.

In the theatre, doctor was going to give an injection, but I told him that I’m scared of injections. He used a good technique by keeping me busy in a conversation with him, asking about my age, no. of girlfriends I had and then I realized I was given the IV. And then they put a mask over my face and everything blacked out.

I woke up in the room having a bandage around my head. It was my first surgery and things weren’t that bad as I thought. The doctor and the nurses were really kind and helpful at any time I needed them. Thanks all who came to visit me and helped me in everything.

When I am fully recovered, I will try to update my blog again :D
Pic taken from deviantart

Thursday, February 28, 2008

I have been tagged...


Tagged by Uniqu3Graph!X

A - Available?: depends...
B - Best friend: Uniqu3Graph!X
C - Cake or Pie?: cake but butter cakes :D
D - Drink of choice: Definitely coke :)
E - Essential thing used everyday: My brain...
F - Favorite color: Black...
G - Gummi bears or worms: Gummi bears...
H - Hometown: Maldives..
I - Indulgence: processing.... No result found!
J - January or February: It doesn't make any difference for me..
K - Kids and names: Kid??? How come... haven't married yet..
L - Life:Its like an examination.. we have to try to pass from this no matter what we have to face..
M - Marriage date: Ohhh.. I don't even think of it now...
N - Number of siblings: 4 elder sis and 1 younger sis
O - Oranges or apples: apple of course...
P - Phobias: Dogs..
Q - Quote: "everything will happen for good and for everything theres a reason it happened. so face it"
R - Reason to smile: Just happens when someone smiles at me or look at me!!!!
S - Season: If it rains, its ok any season.. :D
T - Tag three people: nadhies d.r.e.a.m.s of d.r.e.a.m.s, The Enigmatic Un-foreseen and Joalifathi
U - Unknown fact about me: As it says its UNKNOWN :D :D
V - Vegetable you do not like: Leeks and brinjal
W - Worst habit: if i am angry or if i get mad at someone i cant talk nicely :(
X - x-rays you have had: My left wrist.. it was very recently...
Y - Your favorite food: Roshi and curry...
Z - Zodiac: Taurus

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Favoring...


We all would have met and have been with different kinds of people from different areas with different backgrounds. But they all share something very common. I have noticed (I'm sure you would have too) that some parents favor their children. I just wanted to share some of my experiences of situations like this and their outcomes.

First, we may have to bring into our consideration, why do parents do that? It's maybe coz they don't love their children equally. After all, they are children of them. Why does this happen? Why can't they love their children equally? It's a fact that we won't love everyone the same. It's in our nature. Similarly, parents are also humans, this applies to them and they love their children differently. Some don't show it to their children, and some parents show the children how different they are from their siblings.

Most of the parents favor the eldest or the youngest in the family. Some favor their son, others their daughter. Some favor because of the skin color and some for good looking children. Regarding the skin color, we all know that there is a big difference in the world for blacks and the whites. The whites don't like the blacks. So this could be just an example. But still, eldest or youngest, white or black, son or daughter, cute or ugly, they are still children of their parents. They also need attention, care and love as equally as their brothers and sisters. Having a step-mother or a step-father is a different case. They might not love their step-children as they love their own children.

How are they being favored? From the parents view, the child who is being treated well will always be good... will not do any mistakes.... get what they want, anytime they want. It's just a matter of pointing the finger and asking for it. If they don't get what they want, the child will get stubborn and make him get it. But when the child who is not loved equally does something wrong, they will be punished and scolded. Children start to realize how different they are from each other. This result in the child who was favored being careless in taking their responsibilities and the other will do anything to get the attention and love of his parents. This is a decision the parents take without thinking for the consequences it might bring.

What the parents get after all?? Eldest or the youngest, boy or a girl, white or black, cute or ugly, after they grow up, the child who was treated will start to make their rules on things and scold parents and always ask things and will get what ever they wants from their parents, while the child who was not given attention will not ask much things from parents instead they will do things for parents and they will care and help to the parents more… What's your knowledge about this??
Pic taken from deviantart

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Uniqu3 Graph!X....


Welcome Uniqu3 Graph!X (www.uniquegraphix.blogspot.com) to the blogging world..

After a long time he is back on blogger.. I can say to all my blog readers that he is really a unique graphic designer.. He is having real good talent in graphics.. Specially drawing portraits in photoshop.. He is a super talented guy for that.. So common bro, show everyone what you have got. Hope your blog will be interesting... n wish you all the best. Cheers Uniqu3 Graph!X...
Pic taken from Uniqu3Graph!X

Saturday, February 23, 2008

May Allah bless her soul and grant her eternal bliss…


23rd February 2007, the saddest day in my life. It was one year from today, a friday morning around 8:15AM, I got a call from one of my elder sister… That time I was sleeping... Without even saying "Hello" my sis said "Reyga maama niyaavejje" ("Grandma passed away last night") I couldn't utter a word. it sent a shiver down my spine. Then sis told me that they were trying to call me but i had no credit in my phone…

Still I remember the last word she said to me... That was December 2006.. The night I left my island she told me "dhen neyge maama aa dhimaavaane kameh ves dharifulhaa" ("I'm not sure if we will meet again") she was really true… I know she really loved me and I really love her too.. She is the only grandparent I met from my family...

After she passed away, i went to my island on August 2007.. Thats only for a week.. But i didn't want to go to grandma house. But it's only 2 minutes walking distance from my home... Coz for me, it's always my grandmother's house. I go there to see her. I didn't want to step in the house and know that she's not there anymore. I really miss her and i always will.

When ever she met any of my sisters, at first she always asked them about me... Sometimes my sisters make her sad showing my pictures.. They say when ever she saw my pic, she will cry saying that she really loved me.. I know why she loved me that much.. Coz i am the only grandson who is behaving well and trying to study as much as i can, and I have never said a word against her.. I really respected and respect her.. I am really happy that she never called me by my name.. She always called me "magey dharifulhu" ("my son")..

If she made anything special in her house, she always brought to us.. And now i really miss all that.. I really like her food.. Normally traditional food.. Kashikeyo fani, gabulhi huni or somthing, i cant remember the names and many more.. At my home, papaya trees were there always. Those trees were specially for her.. She really likes papaya and if theres any ripe papaya, my mum always says don't pluck that papaya, that was for grandma.. and she really like Milk tea and Cream cracker biscuit... She likes sweet things...

Still there comes times when i still can't believe that she passed away. When I remember her or when I see her pictures sometimes it makes me cry without my intentions… May Allah bless her soul and grant her eternal bliss…
Pic taken from deviantart

Thursday, February 21, 2008

You're my mother...


When shower was pouring
In the dark evening
You were the warmth who was by my side
You're my mother

When even the rabbit on the moon was crying of the darkness of the night
You were the moonlight who gave me light
You're my mother

My mother, you turned your blood to milk for me
I owe you my whole life for holding me inside of you for months
I love you mother
You're the fountain of life
Mother, you're my queen
I'll be there for you all along through this journey of life

On the ocean in a windy day
In the ship with broken sails
You were the peddle you were my saviour
You're my mother

In the sweating noon
You were the shade you were the breeze
You're my mother
Translation of a Sinhala Song..
By one of my SL friends..

Pic taken from deviantart

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

EK get - together.....


We have had another get-together 2day with some of the EK members. It wasn't a formal get-together, but just to meet up coz today turned out to be a holiday. I arrived late while everyone else enjoyed and was having lunch. I also had lunch and joined the gang. It was so good to see them after a long time. After having a chat, finally we went on a photo shoot as usual. Time was short but It was really fun... Met some new members, like Gomida, tharidhuDR, icreation... There was only one girl and i didnt know who she was. They told she was Malee and i got a little shock to hear that. coz all these days i was thinking that Malee was a boy :D... I am really sorry that i coudnt even talk her this time.. Dont know why.. Next time I'll talk her...

I coudnt stop laughing when tck tried to give malee's hand bag to fazaal and shoot the pics.. Thnx DJpata for arranging and inviting us to this get-together. It was fun and i really enjoyed with u guys. Cheers guys.. Hope we'll have a big celebration on our 2nd anniversary....

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Mt.lavina Beach... A memorable trip with our guest....

Atlas we have made another visit to Mountlavinia Beach today... I have been there so many times, but today we had so much fun with one of my friend's brother. He came over to stay in our place for 3 days. At the beach, it brought so many wonderful memories from the past.. . We took lot of pictures.. Bought snacks.. Even we got our legs wet in the seashore.

We have been planning to go there for three weeks.. But everyday we came up with something, preventing us from getting there. Even yesterday we tried to go there. It was a normal sunny day. But as we stepped out of the house, the sky started to get dark n it started dripping rain drops. We thought that the rain would go away soon. But as we got down from the first bus, it started to get heavier. By the time we were in the second bus, the rain started pouring. Oh we were so unlucky. But still with the hope that it would stop soon, we ended up in our final stop running to our lives to get into shade. We got down from the bus when it was in the middle of a cross road. We got half wet in the rain.

We gave up the plan of going to the beach and headed back to our next destination on another bus. Yesterday, we traveled by bus. It was really fun getting wet in the rain and jumping from one bus to the other in the rain.

After having enjoyed a good time we had to say good bye for our guest. Hope he had fun with us. We really did.
Pics taken by Iboo.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Don't use lady's changing rooom...


I have been goin to this place since last month after i broke up with my last gf. I go to this place regularly and im a regular client of them. Yesterday I did somthing that i shouldn't have to done.. But that was not a bad thing, neither is good. I used lady's changing and shower room at this place. As the lady's room was not been used by any ladies, i thought it's ok for me to use it just once... or maybe twice... or thrice ;). coz there is only one toilet for gents and one for ladies, 4 of my friends were in a que in gents room.... So i didn't want to wait in the que and went to ladies room. i was changing while someone tried to open the door from outside. I hurried and open the door. I was wearing only my shorts... There was a girl in front of me and she screamed when she saw me.... One of my friends who happened to be outside the changing room saw all this.

I was shocked and was frozen in place for a while, coz of her scream.. Then i ran into gents room where my friends were. I went in there and burst out laughing... i couldn't stop my laugh. Later we knew that she was from Maldives.. We had a story to talk about all the way to home from there. It was fun. I really want to meet that girl once again and want to ask her about her feelings about that incident... :D hope one day i'll meet her sooon....
Pic taken from deviantart

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

HaPpY B'dAy SuMkOo


She is my 2nd niece and she is 7 years today...

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

What do you think about my decision????


Here's the story about my most recent love story. For those who are new, consider this as a lesson.

I met her around 2 yrs and 6 months ago. One of my friends which turned out to be one of her friend, gave her my email add. We added each other and we chatted... First as strangers... After that our friedship started to blossom and we got to be good friends... But we both knew, we were chatting for some reason.. I always kept telling her that i won't be her boyfriend unless i met her face to face... not because i go with a persons appearance, but with her real attitudes and behaviour.. We chatted for more than 6 months.. Sometimes she called me to my home phone... even msged me.. She always tells me that she loves me.. But I couldn't beleive that someone can fall in love without seeing in person... So I didn't believe that and I always said that I also like her but I don't love her.. and that, I wont say I won't love her either..

Almost after 06 months, she came to Sri Lanka.. I went to meet her for the first time in person. I had no words to say. For me she was gorgeous. But I knew it wont be easy for me to fall in love with her… Coz even then, I loved my first love.. One beautiful day, I invited her to my place. We talked and talked... I told her what I want, what I like, who I am, so on.. After telling everything about me and almost my love history, I proposed her and she said YES.. Two days later, she flew back to Male'. The day she left, she cried over the phone, but I didnt feel a thing. Coz I wasn't in love with her..

Back from Male' she message me, but I cant reply for every single message she sent.. I knew she would be sad but I told her that from my past experience, I won't spend money for any girl... Specially not from my phone.. I told her everything.. and I told her we don't know each other then.. And It will take time... I believe I was not good for her.. I didn't care that much.. But she really cared me a lot.. called me always.. always messaged me, asked about me and what i was doing..

Months later, I went to Male' for holidays, I didnt go to her place everyday.. She complained and one of her cousin called me and talked me for more than an hour.. after that day I realised I was wrong.. she really loved me and I should care her if I wanted her to be my gf. Few days later, I came back to Sri Lanka.

As usual, I didn't send messages for her but she was calling me messaging me and we talked a lot.. But still I was not feeling any affection to her.. But somewhere within me, I always missed her.. But I don't know why I didn't care her..

On august 2007 I went to Male' and I gave her a little surprise… the following day I set off to My island… and after being in island for one week I came back to Male'.. But this time I spent more time with her and I really felt something to her..

Now here I am, back in Sri lanka... And now, I can say that I really love her.. Almost every night, I was telling my bestfriend's girlfriends to call her and tell her to call me... Sometimes she kept asking me why i suddenly changed. Why I kept telling her to call me. She knew I was different, and for the first time, i felt that i was in love with her. After nearly a year I was in a very tender and affectionate long-distance relationship with her.

She applied for a course from abroad. She got leave from her workplace and she wanted to come here to meet me.. But unfortunately for some reasons, she couldn't come.. Those days I was like mad to meet her. I tried all the possible ways to bring her. On the process, i almost lost a good friend. On January 3rd, she went abroad for her higher studies...

While she was at the airport, she sent me two messages. I didn't know it was going to be the last messages that I was ever going to get from her. One message said, "thnxs loabee. Kuda koh delay vehjje. Am bored here. Tc always ingey. Gona mis u. luv u. rgds 2 ibu n Salwa n her sis 2 :)" and the last message i got from her is, "nw n flight. abt 2 leave."

After two or three days I met her on msn and we talked, as usual.. I asked her to give me her number and she told me she will give the number later.. The reasons she said was that her brother was using her number. She said she will send me the number as soon as her brother leave on 11th of January... I waited, waited and waited. 11, 12 and 13 gone. No message from her. I kept sending offline messages to her from msn.. No luck... I asked from her sis and cousin sis.. and they told they don't have her number.. They said if they got it, they would give me. But still no news and on 18th I sent her a mail. Asking where she was and about her...

On 19th night I got a reply from her. I was happy for a moment, but i couldnt beleive what I saw then. She dumped me with a damn email. The reason was i didnt care her the way she wanted. I had to accept the truth and sent her a reply. What a great way to end a relationship. She started it over internet and she ended it over internet. When she knew that i didnt even love her or cared her then, she was dying for me. When i started to care about her, she broke-up with me saying that i didnt care her before.

Somehow I got her number.. I called her.. but she cut the phone.. I dunno how many times i dialled her. I messaged her but no reply and I begged her to unblock me from messenger and talk me only once.. She unblocked me...

She told me that she doesn't love me because of me... she said that she was going to tell that for a long time.. but she had no guts to tell that over the phone.. I asked her if she was thinkin for so long about breaking up, why she was trying to come to meet me last December.. she said she wanted to end our relationship staying face to face with me.. I coudn't absorb the fact that if she was telling the truth. While she was unable to say that over the phone, how can she say it in front of me???? What was all that in her blog??? i was left with so many questions... i came to knw from her that she was in anger that nobody from her family called her for more than a week. Maybe that was the reason she took the decision.

Anyways I promised her I won't try to contact her.. Just because she was asking me how I got her number. She also said that if she knew who gave me her number, she wouldn't talk to that person. For something I did, she doesn't have to be angry with others. I didn't want that to happen. Though I wanted to call her, I made a promise so i don't want to break my promise.. all these days I was waiting for a sign, coz her sis and cousin told me that they will talk her. When she realises that she was wrong, she will come back to me.. But how can I stay like this??? Coz I loved her.. I was hurt.. I cant concentrate on other things.. Always always keep thinking about her.. And yesterday, whole day I was in my room, alone.. coz I didn't want to show my face to anyone..

Just then, I thought to be strong and face the truth. Completely erase her from my mind. If she really loved me she wouldn't have done that to me. So now I believe that she lied to me.. She used me for her time pass, just like the other girls i bumped into.. And Now I hate her.. Why did she make the first move? Why did she give me so many compliments? Now I don't even want to hear her name... But I thank her family, specially her sis and cousin who was very helpful for me and kind. I'm sorry to break this to them, but still, I posses a heart of flesh. Yeah from today I took my final decision… I won't wait for her and waste my precious time as i wasted two whole years. For the first time, i want to live my life for me. I also have a right to choose what's good for me and what's not. Now I realise that I was to easy to play with. I don't want it to be that way. Not anymore!!!
Pic taken from deviantart

Monday, January 28, 2008

I Still Miss You


This yearning in my heart
This confusion in my mind
The words left unspoken
Haunts me all the time

Everyday I watch pass by
With an emptiness in my life
And a hole in my heart
Where only you belong

There are nights I wake up crying
And wishing you were here
To hold me in your arms
And kiss away my tears

There is something that keeps me holding on -
What I'll never know
But one day things will go my way
And I'll have you in my arms

By Angela Craig
Pic taken from deviantart

Saturday, January 26, 2008

New or amended constitution???


If somebody said that, in 2008, Maldivians faced very unusual things, it could not be a lie. In Ha. Hoarafushi, a 20 year old boy tried to stab the President with a knife. Few days after the incident, from the People's Special Majilis they passed and voted that a maximum presidential limit of two five-year terms from THIS constitution. This created a big debate among the parties and citizen, whether DRP candidate Maumoon can run as a candidate for the election of November 2008. Then we started hearing some people saying that this constitution was not an amended, but a new constitution. So under the new constitution, DRP candidate Maumoon can run in this election as well. That means for another 2 terms.

Can Maumoon run in this election? Is the People's Special Majlis debating on a new constitution???? or are they revising the old constitution??? This is what Maldivians speak of these days. Internet, daily news papers, weekly magazines, in sitting rooms, on the roads, in public places & even in the crowds people talk about this. This is the most popular questions in everywhere in the Maldives.... Of course, how people think are different.. But truth will be truth.... N there should be a truth behind what DRP's Parliment members speak or what MDP & independent parliament members speak...

If its a new constitution, DRP candidate, Maumooon can rule as a candidate for the next election as his 7th term of Maldivian president...

But if its a amended constitution, DRP candidate, Maumoon ruled out as presidential candidate for the next election.. Coz People's Special Majlis members voted to impose a maximum presidential limit of two five-year terms from THIS constitution.. And he has ruled as a president for 6 terms from THIS constitution... Am i right???

There is only one thing for us now.. Just wait and see what will happen in the end... See if this Constitution turn out to be a new or amended constitution... Just check the above video to watch and hear what our beloved President Maumoon Abdul Gayyoom said in his speaches on different occasions about the consititution wich is being dabated in People's Special Majlis... And what the President of the People's Special Majlis, Gaasim Ibrahim said to the People's Special Majlis members about the constitution...

Saturday, January 19, 2008

End of another chapter of my love life...


Yeah just now I received a mail from her.. It says it’s the end of our relationship… Why?? I know it’s all my fault... and I believe that from my heart…

What do i do? When i wanted her more than anyone & when i realized my fault and tried to make it right, she said goodbye! Now it hurts me a lot....

Anyways, I wish her a happy life and a bright future..

Pic taken from deviantart

Thursday, January 17, 2008

ElakiriZine

Here I am going to share an E-Magazine... Its from ELAKIRI.COM, the largest online community in Sri Lanka.. Yeah its callled ElakiriZine... This is the second edition of this magazine which includes informations about the site, ideas and inreviews about Elakiri Members, troubleshoots, health and fitness tips and many more important information.. Hope you guys will like it... N I would like to thnx to Fazaal (Editor & Designer), Neon White (Co-Editor), X Pert (Proof Reader), Lich and GTRZ (Patron) and all the members who submit articles to this magazine... I would like to say sorry that i couldn't give any help to you guys for this edition, but i am sure i will give some contribution for the next edition... EK rocks...



CLICK HERE TO DONWLOAD THE SECOND EDITION OF ELAKIRIZINE

CLICK HERE TO DONWLOAD THE FIRST EDITION OF ELAKIRIZINE

*You will need Adobe reade(acrobat) to view this files..

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

2008